Friday, September 17, 2010

The Dog Did WHAT In the Night??????

For the last 3 years I've had a rough collie called Brandy. Lovely thing, real bouncy, full of beans, pure-bred and all. The only problem was that Brandy was sterile...infertile... BARREN!!!! So needless to say, when the dog next door humped the arse off it every now and then, although we did chase it away, we never gave it a second thought, other than, you're a ginger dog, she's not, it'd never work out...


Two nights ago, Brandy gave birth to 6 puppies.


>WAIT??
>WHAT??
>DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY SHE WAS BARREN???



Yes, yes I did, but either we have an immaculate conception on our hands, or we were mistaken in our assumption....I would think that's the correct answer since we never actually got her checked out.....


Now, as we were not aware that the dog was, in fact, preggers, when she started makin a bit of a ruaille buaille in the middle of the night, we assumed it was to do with neighbouring dogs, the scent of a fox in the wind, something else, and it wasn't until the morning, when  the father went out to feed her that he noticed the pups runnin round...and it wasn't until about 8 hours later when my brother, having returned home from school, said he'd go check on the pups, that I even heard they existed!! And it took about 10minutes before I believed it..


Now, unfortunately, as is wont to happen in a dog's first litter, the majority of the pups did not make it through the first day. We now have 2 left and they seem strong enough little things,  so hopefully they'll survive. The brother named one Cat, much to the disapproval of my mother who says it'll be confused....yes..because it knows its a dog and not a cat....


>sorry there boss, don't mean to disturb you there but, you called me Cat....
-yeh?
>eh, well..it's just...it's just that I'm a dog......


I named the other Woofles. Coz it's a cute name. and it means nothing.....


The moral of the story is, never believe your dog when it tells you there's no way it can pregnant so it should be free to shag whatever dog it wants! Don't believe it when it says that if the boy dog is chased away half way through that it can't get knocked up. And most of all, don't have 2-way conversations with your dog, unless you're Dr. Doolittle or something...that shit can get you thrown in the funny farm....

5 comments:

  1. I'm a new follower - Please follow me back. For every follower that joins I will be releasing a Unicorn back into the wilds of the New Jersey boardwalk. So please do your part by joining and saving these special creatures. Thanks
    Thanks, Mr. Monkey

    http://laughingmonkeystick.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  2. aw wow, i'll have to check out your blog now!!! anything for the unicorns....those guys........

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love your blog! I'd love to feature you on my blog! I developed the idea for "Featured Followers by Elle© " & this is how I promote my followers. But it helps them increase traffic to their blog & allows other followers to learn more about the blogs that I feature. If you're interested my blog is at www.edkdolce.blogspot.com.
    ♥ Elle

    ReplyDelete
  4. ooh cool!!! thanks!! :) deadly feature idea!!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. ok, so ive just visited your blog and you have most definitely earned yourself another follower!!! the features idea is brilliant also, nice work!!!! im headin back to your blog to read some more....!!!

    ReplyDelete