Tuesday, December 21, 2010

If you were made of cheese I'd eat you

Ok..I know how this looks....


But don't be alarmed, because it's exactly what it looks like. Cept maybe worse... 


Now I know we're all warned about the dangers of eating cheese before bed, apparently it's hard to digest and so it gives you bad dreams or something. Well, let me tell you a story...
Once upon a time, there was a girl who ate cheese before bed......(wavy fading into dream lines)


It was a bright sunny day, and I was out for a nice friendly stroll in the park. The birds were singing, the sun was splitting the rocks..and people say cheese gives you nightmares??? Along my walk, I spotted a group of lads I'm friends with and wandered over for the banter, y'know, the usual stuff- the weather (of course! I'm Irish, what else would I talk about??) the general craic, and all of a sudden, a strange and terrible thing happened!


In front of my eyes, my group of friends transformed....INTO CHEESE!!!


And this is where it gets really bad, coz it all goes downhill from here, because in dreamland, where you can't control things and things sometimes change as you look at them, my subconscious mind couldn't decide whether they should now look like blocks of cheese or if they should look like people made out of cheese, so it kept changing between the two and getting really trippy, and then....I was hungry.....I mean, you'd do the same..it was free cheese and it'd only get spoiled in the sun, and I was hungry!!! and so....I cut a slice off one of my friends....
Yes....I cut a slice off one of my own cheese friends so that I could consume him...


And then it explodes into a whirlwind of trippy again! Coz now my subconscious mind is in overdrive and it doesnt know whether the slice should look like a slice of cheese or a limb or a slice of person and at one stage I swear it was a slice in the image of somebody's face, and at the same time it's trying to figure out whether the cheese people should look like cheese, and in that case have a slice missing, or should look like people and in which case have a limb or a slice missing off themselves, and it all keeps changing as it sorts itself out, and it's all around me and I'm eating the cheese and I just can't stop and I can't decide if I'm just havin a snack of cheese or if it's cannibalism!!!!!


And then I wake up......in a cold sweat...or what I hope is a cold sweat....and vow to myself that this would not be the last time I ate cheese before bed, coz dammit a dream like that makes you feel refreshed, and the look on your friends' faces when you tell them 
"I ate you last night" makes your day....


Cheese dreams. Making bad dreams good fun.

2 comments:

  1. hahahaha oh dear....that comment was cheesy! :P good thing i love cheese ha! :)

    ReplyDelete